Friday Thoughts on Faith: Displaying the Work of God

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I can’t stop thinking about this quote from The Sacred Romance by John Eldredge.
The battles God calls us to, the woundings and cripplings of soul and body we all receive, cannot simply be ascribed to our sin and foolishness, or even to the sin and foolishness of others. When Jesus and the disciples were on the road one day, they came upon a man who had been blind since birth. “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents?” they asked him. “neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.” And with that, Jesus spat on the ground, made some mud to place on the man’s eyes, and healed him (John 9:1-7)
 
Many of us who are reading these words have not yet received God’s healing. The display of God’s works through our wounds, losses, and sufferings is yet to be revealed. And so, we groan and we wonder. (The Sacred Romance, pg 61)

“…so that the work of God might be displayed.” That phrase is powerful. The work of God is displayed all around me every day, isn’t it? When I turn to look out of my office window to watch a storm front move in from the Everglades. When I see the brilliant yellows, grays, oranges, blues, and pinks of a Florida sunrise over the ocean or sunset over the horizon. Celebrating the life of a friend who has crossed over and is finally free and home. Watching my son make a decision he knows is in his own best interest when he would rather do something totally different. Celebrating a friend who earns his 90 days sober chip and another who earns his 1 year. All of these display the work of God.

I think one of the reasons I can’t stop thinking about the quote is because of all the times I have decided that I must be doing something wrong because my life doesn’t look like I think it should. I haven’t achieved what I think I should have achieved. I don’t have the things I think I should have. It amazes me how deeply I can be committed to the reward/punishment view of life. Oftentimes, I don’t even realize it at first. Then I waste so much energy trying to fix things when the simple reality could be that God is just up to something separate and apart from my good behavior or bad behavior.

Think about that. What if God is up to something apart from my behavior? What if He is simply working out His will through my life? What if how it looks today and what I have to travel through to get to what it will look like in the future creates the opportunity to display his glory and accomplish something for someone else and doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with me, per se? Now, please hold your theological high horses at bay and let me qualify that statement to say of course, obedience. Of course, holiness. However, if my behavior, good or bad, is the determining factor of what I enjoy, then God is no longer God – I have become Him. Or a very poor reflection of Him. “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.”

I think about my buddy Andy. Andy crossed over into eternity a few weeks ago after years of battling an insidious throat and mouth cancer. He hadn’t eaten solid food in nearly 8 years. He went through surgery upon surgery, chemo upon chemo, radiation upon radiation, and Andy never lost faith. I’m sure he despaired and I’m sure at times he had questions. But mostly, he just continued to live his life as best he was able and as best his body would let him. When I look at Andy’s life, it’s tempting to ask “what did he do wrong?”. Andy would tell you, plenty. Really, though, I think what Andy walked through and who he became in that process was all about displaying the work of God.

And I know of MANY whose lives have drawn closer to God because of it.

Gratefully, I have not experienced anything approaching the struggle of Andy’s life – but I have certainly had my share. What life hasn’t? Whether its the loss of a job, struggles with teenagers, serious health issues with spouse and close family, or unexpected struggles and set backs in the lives of people I love. I could look at those things collectively as a hard life. Or maybe just a normal life. Or I could stop myself and ask, how many of these things have happened “so that the work of God might be displayed”?

And my answer would be…all of them.

Running the Race: 4 Lessons About Coaching I Learned Watching My Son Become a Runner

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Sooo….as I type this, the Rio Olympics have come to a close. I’m so excited that I can now sleep again. I’ll admit it. I’m an Olympics junkie. I have spent much of the last two weeks in a self-induced Olympics hangover. It’s a thing.

It is the result of staying up far too late and expending a great deal of emotional energy cheering on these amazing athletes as they pursue their dreams. And while I will drop the name of Michael Phelps here in a blatant and shameless attempt to attract attention, I have many other favorite moments.  Among them, in no particular order….Simone Manuel’s win in the 100 fly, David Boudia and Steele Johnson, the women’s 4×100 and 4×400 relay teams, Ashton Eaton and the decathlon, Katie Ledecky, Maya Dirado, and even Usain Bolt – truly poetry in motion.

Watching the Olympics this time has been a different experience because I now watch Track and Field through new eyes. I’ve always enjoyed the Decathlon and the Heptathlon (Jackie Joyner-Kersee anyone?) But things changed this year because of my son.

You see, my son is a runner.

He’s always been athletically inclined and he’s always been quick on his feet. How many times when he was a toddler did I think, “Why did we ever teach him to walk?” But he walked at 10 months old and never looked back.

Now that he is on the threshold of high school, running has taken on a whole new meaning for him and for our family. It started last fall with Cross Country. Then, he became a three event competitor in Track and Field including running anchor on the 4×400 relay (the penultimate event at scholastic Track Meets). In fact, he ended up competing in two events at the state Middle School Championship in his very first season.

I have to tell you that I’ve heard phrases like, “Run your race” and “Finish strong” my whole life. But unless and until you are a competitive runner – or watching your kid become a competitive runner – you have no idea what that means. At any given moment I have experienced a plethora of emotions: concern, worry, fear, pride, struggle, joy. Tears of relief. Tears of joy. Tears of pride. It’s unnerving. I’m more at ease now than I was when we started this journey, but it’s still hard.

I have learned a lot about coaching from watching how he has been coached in this, his first year of truly competitive athletics. Years ago, my brother-in-law, an NCAA competitive running coach, told us to let our son just play. There will be time to coach him when he’s older. For now, just let him hold on to his love of running.

It was good advice. We heeded it. Over the years he’s played soccer, basketball, and t-ball – he even swam one season in a rec league – and just let him love it. So when the opportunity came for him to be able to run Cross Country last Fall – he was ready. He made the choice.

I have learned four great lessons from watching his coaches this past year. Lessons that are important reminders for myself as a coach. They are also important insight into what you can expect from a coach, what you should expect from a coach. They are great leadership lessons.

Here is what his coaches did so well:

Lesson #1: Met Him Where He Was

First and chief among the lessons was that his coaches met him where he was. My son had never been a competitive runner before. He had never trained consistently for anything like this. His coaches understood that and started slowly. Placing him in situations where they could just see what he was capable of.

They didn’t push him too far, or expect too much from him.

That’s the mark of great coaching. A great coach should meet you where you are. Your coach should take the time necessary to understand the current state. I like to focus on this during the discovery session with new/prospective clients. Usually, my clients will offer this with very little prompting, but a few well crafted questions can really help. Some of the types of questions you might want to be prepared to answer:

  • What is it that has encouraged you to seek out the help of a coach?
  • What are some of the situations that you have experienced that you are concerned about?
  • What are you hoping to accomplish in your coaching?
  • What’s happening now?
  • What are you noticing?

Establishing a baseline for current state is important. But it is equally, if not more important,  to define where you’re going.

Lesson #2: Did Not Let Him Stay Where He Was

Once his coaches got a sense for where he was, they very quickly began to move him forward. They didn’t leave him where he started. They challenged him to move just a little bit faster or just a little bit farther. It’s amazing to watch how quickly success begins to come with just the right amount of encouragement.

When you work with a coach, you should expect and be prepared for being challenged and pushed. Otherwise, what’s the point? One of the most effective ways I have found to make that happen is by simply asking the question: what do you want?

The goal of any coaching relationship is to move beyond where you are to where you want to be. Asking what do you want may seem really simple, but it’s not. Now, it is important to hold on to the idea that this is about you…not about anyone else. I will occasionally encounter clients whose answer to the question is focused on someone else. “I want them to stop.” or “I want my boss to do this or that.”

The problem with that is you can’t control what other people do. You have to focus on what you can do in order to achieve your success. I’m amazed how many times I encounter clients who can’t answer this question. They really don’t know. If you don’t know what you want, how will you ever get it?

Lesson #3: Made Small Adjustments

Once they started him moving forward, it became clear what he needed to do differently. His coaches began to help him make small adjustments. How to stand properly at the start, how to arc over the high jump, how to lean into the hurdles. All of those little things can make a huge difference in performance.

When you work with a coach, they will often need to help you reframe your thinking in order to help you move toward your goal. My goal is always to create a new space for a client to walk into. Small adjustments can reap big results. A different response to being questioned. A different way to handle conflict. A different perspective on another person’s behavior.

Many times, all you need is to make one small change to reap huge results. In my son’s case, I remember when he started running hurdles and he was frustrated that he wasn’t running faster. (One thing to know is that he hates to not be good at something. If he can’t do it well quickly, he doesn’t really want to do it at all. It’s a work in progress.) As he voiced his frustration at practice one day, his coach watched him run the hurdles and said just two words, “Don’t jump.” In other words, don’t try to jump over the hurdles because that motion causes you to straighten up. Just lean into it and extend your stride. Then you move quicker.

He made the change and saw an immediate improvement. Small moves, big rewards.

Lesson #4: Celebrated His Success

As the seasons progressed, both Cross Country and even more so – Track and Field, my son began to experience success. Faster times, qualifying for the state meet, personal bests, team records broken. Every one of these wins brought increased confidence and happiness from our son, sure. That success also brought about celebration from his coaches.

No one was more thrilled when he cleared the high jump bar at 5’2” to qualify for States than his coach. No one was more proud of his “Most Improved” team award (given by his teammates, most of whom were older and much more experienced) than his coach, and no one celebrated any louder than the coach when his relay team crossed the finish line in the final meet of the season under 4 minutes – setting a new team record and qualifying for the state meet for the first time in team history – than his coach.

I spent the last year of sports watching, for the first time, as other people poured into my son. Challenging him to be better, stronger, and faster. Encouraging him when he did. Helping him when he struggled. And above all, loving him well.

Your coach should be invested in you as an individual. Your coach should care deeply about your success. Your coach should celebrate that success along with you.

Watching my son being coached well inspired me. I want to be a better coach. I am working hard to take my own advice and make sure these four lessons are present in my practice.

What’s your coach doing for you?

The results will speak for themselves – like this kid, who wasn’t able to finish his first meet a year ago because he got tripped up and wrenched his knee to finishing second. 

Second Place

Second Place

 

What would you add to the list? What else stands out for you as the marks of great coaching? Leave a comment below and let’s talk about it.

Dropping Things…And Picking Them Back Up

I read this great post from Tricia Lott Williford recently. In it, she quotes T.D. Jakes saying, “The art of managing a lot of things is to never drop the same thing twice in a row.” That’s a great quote.
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I’ve dropped a lot of things in my day. Like this blog, for instance. It’s been a nice long summer. I would love to tell you that was intentional and that I took advantage of that time to reset and refocus and I’m cueing up a long line of posts to astound, enrich, and amaze you. That would be a lie, however.
The truth is, I dropped the ball. Life got busy. I got stuck in the middle of my own small dramas, and I took my eye off the bigger picture – off the larger goal and story. As a result, I’ve let the blog sit here idle for too long.
I am convinced, however, that this is something I’m supposed to be doing and so I will pick it back up and start letting some other things drop. Things like doubt, worry, and distraction. I will also pick up grace and keep moving forward.
So here’s what’s coming – a new post about coaching inspired by my son the runner and energized by watching the Olympics, some more Friday Thoughts on Faith, and a new feature – Wellness Wednesday – where I will attempt to bring multiple aspects of my life and passion together in one place.
I will also #lookdeeper at the reasons behind allowing my voice to go silent in these months and unpack that with you as well.
Ready to pick it up and keep going? Let’s do this…

Cultivating Character

I’m sharing a post today from Michael Hyatt at michaelhyatt.com. Some of you have probably read it already. It is a powerful reminder that who you are as a leader comes before what you do as a leader. Who you are as a person comes before what you do in life.

It is worth the time to read and to view the video – which takes about 15 minutes.

You must do this.

The Reflex of Character

Friday Thoughts on Faith vol 3

Fighting for Life

So this little experiment is off to a miserable start. No sooner had I penned the first post, then I proceeded to go about my life as if nothing were different. For a week. It probably didn’t help matters that I was sick for about 4 days.

I keep coming back to a line from An Ordered Life. “In following the Divine Office, I am done when it is time to be done, and my goal is no longer what I accomplish in a day, but who I become in a lifetime.” Wow.

My goal is no longer what I can accomplish in a day, but who I become in a lifetime? I hear such freedom in this line. Freedom from the pressure to perform. Freedom from the treadmill that mistakes movement for success. Freedom from keeping up with the Jones’ (or at least trying to).

For some reason, I’ve been thinking a lot about who I have become over my own lifetime. I’m not an old man, although I joke with my kids and my Middle School boys that I am. But I am certainly in a season where there is not an insignificant amount of water under the bridge. Paul says, when I was a child I spoke like a child and thought like a child but when I became a man I put off childish things. I wonder, have I done that? Really?

I guess I’m pondering these things because I struggle to see that I am making an impact on the world. I ponder these things because as I watch my children become young adults, I see them struggling under the weight of their doubts and questions. I see the pull and hold the world has on them and I wonder if my failings as a father will cause them to miss the kingdom of heaven. And, if I’m really honest, I wonder if I have missed it. If it’s too late for me.

I’ve been uneasy and unsettled much of the day and into the evening. So after dinner, I retreat to the bedroom. I put on some worship music and just sit. Then I begin to sing. And my heart begins to quiet. Then I pick up my lenten reading and engage my brain in a different direction. And my mind begins to quiet. I feel a return of His presence in a tangible way. And I lift my eyes away from the immediate and they are refocused on the eternal.

224726_2004835842018_150680_nI realize now, looking back on the moment, that this is what my heart cries for: freedom. The freedom of focusing not on the immediate or the urgent, but on the eternal. If I focus on the eternal, my heart is quieted. If I focus on the eternal, my mind is clear. If I focus on the eternal, I love well. If I focus on the eternal, I serve without complaining. If I focus on the eternal, I am at peace.

The best part? It has taken me longer to write this down than it did to live it out. Making space, cultivating that capacity, doesn’t have to be overwhelming – or require hours of solitude. It requires intention and willingness and a decision.

God help me to make that decision…for freedom…for You.

How’s Your Vision?

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When you are a music major, you take at least one semester of conducting. It is one of the more enjoyable classes  because it’s very active. There is not a lot of sitting and listening to lectures. To learn how to conduct, you need to conduct. So it’s a lot of standing and practicing the patterns (yes, there is a method to those movements – see the picture at the top of this page).

What you quickly realize is that just as no two singing voices are the same, no two conducting styles are the same either. You also just as quickly realize that, as in most areas of expertise, some people have an affinity for conducting and others…don’t.

If this is your first time here, or you need a refresher, might I suggest you start with: 3 Leadership Lessons from Great Maestros, How Great Leaders Get Work Done, and 3 Ways to Build a High Performance Team.

We’re exploring lessons to be learned from great music conductors. Today, we are looking at the third lesson to be learned: rigorously crafting, refining, and executing a vision.

Crafting the Vision

Have you ever been around a leader who didn’t have a clear vision? It’s hard to follow that leader because you don’t know where he or she is going. It can make you cautious. It is most certainly frustrating. A leader without a clear vision, is a leader who cannot make decisions. A leader who cannot make decisions, while very common, is nowhere nearly as successful as they could be.

Legend tells us that Ludwig van Beethoven, towards the end of his life,  was still composing and conducting though he had lost most of his hearing. In fact, he cut the legs off of his piano so he could lay on the floor and feel the sound vibrations in order to keep composing. At the premiere for his Ninth Symphony, the one featured in the video above, it is said that Beethoven continued to conduct long after the orchestra finished playing. It was only after the concert master stood and touched his arm that Beethoven realized they were no longer playing. He could not hear it, but he had a very clear sound in his mind.

Your vision has to be just as crystal clear.

Refining the Vision

Now…I’m not talking about a pithy statement that you wear on your ID badge and hang on the wall in the break room (although that can be helpful). I mean a real vision of where you need and want your team to be. What are you chasing after? Why does it matter? How will you know if you catch it? When you can clearly answer those types of questions for yourself you are on your way. It is much easier to follow a leader who knows where he or she wants to take you.

I realize that may sound unrealistic. It shouldn’t be. I don’t mean to imply that once the vision is set, you can only go in that one direction. Certainly not. As you move towards the fulfillment of your vision, there may be new opportunities or situations that present themselves that may serve to further refine the original vision into something even better. You absolutely should entertain those ideas and, where it serves the original vision, make adjustments. 

Executing the Vision

Once you’ve crafted and communicated a clear vision and started moving your team in that direction, focus becomes critical. Every day there will be distractions that present themselves. Far from being giant time sucks (like endlessly scrolling social media or never ending levels of the latest mobile game) distractions usually disguise themselves as very worthy endeavors. The problem is they aren’t helping you or your team deliver against your vision.

This is perhaps the single most difficult concept for us to grasp in this “postmodern” world. No matter how great or enticing, we simply cannot do it all. We are not meant to do it all. In order to stay true to the vision you have crafted, you have to be willing to say no to what doesn’t advance that vision. That is a very hard thing, indeed. (For more about this topic see this post, The One Skill You Must Master).

Distractions come in all shapes and sizes. Most of them are ultimately good and worthy in their own right. However, as you lead your team, organization, or ensemble, anything that isn’t serving to fulfill the vision is ultimately a distraction. Anything. You have to get rid of it. Cut it off. Shut it down. If you don’t, you’ll soon have your team chasing their tails, not sure how to proceed – or worst of all – afraid to do anything.

This concept is no doubt challenging. I think of it like one of those DIY remodeling shows on cable TV (Fixer Upper, anybody? No? Just me?) On these shows, people find items or sometimes entire properties that are past their prime. They were someone else’s discards. Someone else who didn’t have the vision. Then the right person comes along and with the right guidance creates something extraordinary.

There is certainly someone in the world whose vision of what they are doing is completely different from your vision. What if that person’s vision is actually focused on those same distractions?  They will be able to leverage those good and worthy things to fulfill their vision. You will be able to direct your energy to fulfill your own vision. Those good things are still accomplished. You each fulfill what you were meant to fulfill. In the process, the world is changed.

How awesome is that?

A Final Thought

There are a lot of other lessons to be learned. We haven’t touched on the importance of preparation. We didn’t get into the critical nature of rehearsals (meetings) or preparing your team to execute. We only scratched the surface of actual execution. I think, however, I will leave you with this final thought.

Every great performance starts with an idea, a roadmap, and a vision. The conductor, you, has to take that idea (the music), the roadmap (the score), and your vision and invite others into it. Then you have to coach, encourage, teach, empower, and focus those others to execute the vision. When you do it well, in whatever setting, the result is pure magic.

 

Friday Thoughts on Faith vol. 2

On the loss of Maya Angelou – And a Generation of Leaders

(Author’s note: I originally wrote this piece two years ago on the morning after Maya Angelou died. I had thought to post it in honor of her birthday on April 4 or to mark the anniversary of her death on May 28. As I reread it this week, though, I decided it was a message that needed to be out there now, for a time such as this.)

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Maya Angelou died this morning. Whether you knew who she was or actually met her and had no clue (as a friend of mine did), she was an important character in our national story. She lived at the center of a defining decade and struggle from which we still have not extricated ourselves fully.

I will make a confession. What I know of Maya Angelou is largely through others experiences of her. I have seen her on TV reading her work and playing the occasional guest spot on Touched By An Angel or some other show. I have read bits and pieces of her poems. I respected her work and I respected her presence. I have never read a single one of her books. (I still haven’t…must remedy that!)

But I am sad today at her passing. And when I probe the depths of that sadness, I think the reason is that hers is but the next in an ongoing list of leaders whose time is fading. I was born at the end of the 1960’s. Indeed, much of the turmoil of that era was winding down by the time I arrived. However, the aftermath of that season of history shaped my childhood in the sense that it had a profound impact on how I experienced the world.

From my earliest memories, I had friends who were black. In Junior High and High School, some of my best friends were hispanic. Now, as an adult living in a major metropolitan region of the Southeast, I am proud to work, play, and worship alongside many people of many different nationalities. My children were both born to parents of other races and do not look like me or my wife.

Out of that season of unrest and violence and change in the 1960’s, there were many, many voices that spoke out. There were some whom I believe were raised up by God to speak peace into the confusion. Not an empty, emotional peace. But a true peace born of understanding and allowing for differences. Not a peace at the cost of silencing those with whom we do not agree. But a peace that passes understanding that can only come from the presence of God through Jesus Christ.

These are true leaders who do not push a political or social agenda, but call us to a higher level of life. Maya Angelou is one such leader. To me, Billy Graham is another. Mother Theresa. Brennan Manning. Martin Luther King, Jr. And there are many others.

What makes me sad is the leadership landscape in our world today. The passing of this great generation leaves a powerful void. I do not hear or see from any on the public stage today the kind of calm, peaceful, reasoned, and hopeful leadership that the world is so desperately crying out for. Everywhere we turn, there are extreme opposites screaming for attention, clamoring for votes, forcing their opinion.

It is no secret that I am a Southern born and raised, White, Conservative, Evangelical Christian man. My upbringing and my faith have influenced my political and social positions just as yours has been influenced by your experience. I hold to many so-called traditional views on things like work, education, marriage and the like. However, above and beyond anything I might think or any opinion I may have is this one thing – God is love.

God is love. God created man in His image. Male and Female, He created them. For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Did you catch that? Whoever. There is no limitation. There is no exclusion. Anyone and everyone.

My point is this, we live in perilous and difficult times. There are huge problems to face and to solve. We live in a world at war. Not just politically or militarily, but spiritually. Life itself is under attack. Freedom itself is under attack.

We need strong leaders who can speak peace into the confusion. And I, for one, do not see them. Do you?

That is why I mourn at the passing of Maya Angelou and others of her generation.

The mission of Look Deeper Coaching is to help myself and others to #lookdeeper. I will persist in that mission. And maybe, just maybe, the voice of peace and love from the Prince of Peace will be heard once again.

After Thought

It is interesting to me that I wrote this nearly two years ago given the political season we find ourselves in as a county in the United States. My observation still stands. If anything, we can likely all agree that it has gotten more pronounced, this leadership void. Those of us who are people of faith, people of God, followers of Jesus must humble ourselves and pray. (See 2 Chronicles 7:13-14) Speak when we must, yes,  but pray without ceasing. 

 

3 Ways to Build a High Performing Team

Music Conductor Hands

We have been exploring leadership lessons from great conductors and how those lessons might apply to our teams, organizations,  and families. Last time, we talked about how great leaders get work done. We talked about setting clear expectations, trusting people, and being their champion. These tactics will empower your team to get work done, no question. But how do you ensure the quality of that work? How do you, as a leader, influence their commitment to do their best work?

That’s what every good conductor does every day, in every rehearsal and in every performance. I can tell you that I performed better under Wes Noble in that one long weekend than at many other times in my singing career. I don’t think I’m alone in that experience, either.  (If you’re a little confused, consider starting here.)

When I think about why that was, I see there are three lessons to be learned. Here are three ways you can help ensure that your team performs at their best. To build a high performing team, start here:

  1. Give them motivation to do well.

When I was singing with Mr. Noble, I knew that I wanted to do well. Now, I know what you’re thinking. What does that have to do with the conductor? It has to do with your mindset as a leader. I’ve been around plenty of leaders in my day whose basic presumptions about their people was that they were going to fail. And those leaders created an environment where failure was nearly inevitable. (Psychologists call this a self-fulfilling prophecy. You failed because I expected you to fail.)

There’s a great scene in a movie starring Michelle Pfeiffer called Dangerous Minds. Dangerous Minds is based on the true story of LouAnne Johnson – a former Marine turned high school English teacher in the inner city of Los Angeles. In this scene, Johnson (played by Pfeiffer)  is explaining how the grading is going to work in her class. She tells the class that they all have an “A” and that all they have to do to keep that “A” is to do their best work all semester.

Now this class of misfits and under achievers don’t know how to react to this news. None of them has ever had an “A” before. And it makes all the difference in how they perform throughout the rest of the school year.

To bring out the best in your team, believe that they are capable of being their best. It will make all the difference in how you lead and it will make all the difference in how they perform.

(Click below to watch the trailer for Dangerous Minds. Sorry, it’s not in HD.)

  1. Help them figure out the hard things.

We sang some of the most complicated choir literature I had attempted up to that point in my singing career. Some of it was just plain hard. We struggled to get parts of it right. We had to fight for it.

Never once did this brilliant conductor berate us or criticize us for not getting it right. In fact, I don’t recall him ever raising his voice. Instead, he helped us figure the hard things out. Consistently. Now, he did not lower his standards (more on this in the next installment). And he did not let us slack off. He never wavered in his belief that we could do it correctly. (See point #1).

I cannot emphasize enough the importance of this truth. In fact, if you remember nothing else from this blog – remember this: you must absolutely believe in the deepest part of you that your team WILL perform at their absolute best. When you are convinced of this, your coaching gets better. When your coaching gets better, your team performs. See how that works?

When we finally did well – he celebrated. He noticed.

  1. Celebrate when they get it right

In our VUCA world, every success can feel like a major battle fought. Precious little is simple or requires minimal exertion from us in the way of energy, effort, or commitment in order to achieve results. I don’t care what business you’re in.

We live in days of heightened stress and even higher expectations. It is critical that you notice when your team performs well. They need to know they are exceeding your expectations. They need to know that you value what they contribute.

Singing for a man like Wes Noble, we wanted to please him. We were killing ourselves (metaphorically) to get those complicated sections right. When we got them right and he smiled and nodded and said “Yes!” or  “Good job!”, it felt absolutely amazing. It kept me wanting to do well. It drove me to do even better.

You have to notice when your team does well, and you have to tell them.

 

At the end of the day, what it takes to create a high performing team isn’t all that complex. What is difficult is the living it out. The execution. It takes discipline. It takes compassion. It takes creativity. The leaders whose teams are killing it are being consistent. If your team isn’t killing it, start with you.

And start with just one of these techniques. Today or first thing tomorrow – pick the one behavior you know you can commit to being consistent in and do it. If you’re feeling pretty good about the state of things, maybe ask your team which one they want more of and focus on that.

Start immediately. Be consistent. Then let me know how it goes. Comment on the blog or drop me a line to matt@lookdeepercoaching.com

Friday Thoughts on Faith

I’m taking the opportunity on this Good Friday 2016 to launch a new feature on the blog called Friday Thoughts on Faith. On Fridays, I will take some time and space to explore what it means to live as a person of faith in modern times. I’m proud to launch this new feature with a piece called, Cultivating Capacity,  and to introduce a new page on the site where I will archive and share these posts. Like, Share, and Follow freely!

Cultivating Capacity

“…cultivating a capacity to live in the image of God.” Luke Eldredge

I read this line recently in an article from &Sons Magazine and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head. The article, titled An Ordered Life, is an examination of the virtues of the monastic life. This was brought on, in part,  by the young author’s foray into an experiment in the mountains of the Pacific Northwest.

I will confess to being more than a little envious. I am becoming more obsessed by the minute. I, too, have long shared the author’s fascination with the cloistered life.

As I sit with this idea of Cultivating Capacity, I feel as though there is deep revelation in this phrase for me. I might even be tempted to think it was just me and my lack of sleep, returning as I was from chaperoning an overnight Middle School trip and sharing a hotel room with four 6th grade boys. I might think that, except that as I read it, I was immediately compelled to share it with my friend, Mike.

Mike and I are in very similar stages of life. Both have kids in High School and Middle School. He still has one in Elementary school, too. Both pushing 50. Both striving daily to get this post modern evangelical life right – balancing career, family, faith and trying to have some semblance of a life. And we both are often stressed out. Both often speaking of missing the deeper things of God in the hurry to keep up. Both struggling to do it right.

We are brothers in arms, he and I. And I know we are not alone.

As soon as I shared the article with him, he wrote me back saying he had often pondered some of the same things. I began to wonder, what would it look like to cultivate a capacity to live in the image of God in the midst of this life I am already living? What if, in spite of my many challenges, issues, and battles – I became more and more intentional about making room for the life of God in me? What if it doesn’t have to be something that happens only on spiritual retreat or for the few who are called to a truly monastic life? How can I bring this idea to life when I wake up in the morning?

So I started asking myself this question at the start of every new activity or next thing in my day. How can I use this to cultivate a capacity to live in the image of God? Right now, as I’m folding this laundry, pumping gas into my car, driving my sullen and silent teenage daughter to church, or coordinating schedules with my wife – where am I living out the image of God?

And I started asking Mike that same question. Because if you are going to reorient your life, it’s infinitely easier with a friend. Especially one who is walking alongside you on that road already.

It’s not as difficult as you might think. Nor as easy as you might hope.

So it is that I find myself writing this post and you find yourself reading it. I don’t think either one is an accident. Maybe you’re reading this because you’re my mom (Hi Mom!) or one of her friends. Or maybe you clicked on the link by mistake from somebody’s random Facebook post. Whatever the circumstances,  the Bible says that deep calls to deep in the Psalm 42. (That entire Psalm sets great context for this post, by the way.)

The deep life of God is crying out to the deep places of your heart. It calls to mine as well. That is why I want to explore this idea of Cultivating Capacity together. I will share on this page what I am learning about this concept, strategies and tactics I’m using to make that space in a very crowded modern life, and offer what encouragement I can as you take your own journey.

Start today. Right now. On this Good Friday, don’t simply rush through your day to get to the weekend. Find a time and a space to reflect on what this day represents and ask yourself, “How am I living in light of the sacrifice that was made for me?”

How Great Leaders Get Work Done

Last week, I shared lessons in leadership learned from working with a great conductor. Chief among the lessons to be learned from great conductors is that great leaders enable the work, they don’t do the work.

Think about it…have you ever seen a conductor jump down off the podium and run back to ring a chime or blow a horn or play a run on the violin? Of course not. Their place is on the podium, baton in hand. The job of the conductor, like the job of the leader, is to keep everyone focused.

I have another secret to share with you. I am a former Cubmaster. As in Cub Scouts. I was the Cubmaster for a pack of 150+ boys. And we even took them all camping (with their families) 6 times a year. On my very first campout as Cub Master, I tried to jump off the platform.

The trailer we pulled that had our camp kitchen supplies and food in it was a little late arriving on Friday night. As soon as the trailer was in place, I immediately jumped into action. We had to get cooking so people could eat!

I was on and off that trailer probably a dozen or more times in about a 15 minute span when one of the den leaders grabbed me by the shoulders, looked me in the eye and said, “Matt! You are the one who knows where everything is and who has to make decisions. Stop doing the work. Stand out there and tell us what needs to be done!” And he was correct.

Everybody values a leader who leads by example, who will never ask you to do something they are unwilling to do for themselves. And that behavior certainly has its place. But most of the time, the most important thing a leader can do is lead. A leader who steps into their role and fully embodies that role, enables everyone else to to get the work done and to get it done well.

I still remember the first rehearsal with Wes Noble at the North Carolina Intercollegiate Honors Chorus. We were in a church in downtown Winston-Salem (home to Wake Forest University and the Reynolds Aluminum company). I remember him walking in and instantly commanding the attention of every person. And he held that attention.

He gave instructions, inspiration, and set clear expectations. Never once did he try to do the job of the choir. It was our job to perform. To deliver the music as written, correctly. Mr. Noble enabled us to do that by being present, being confident, and being consistent. His vision was clear from the beginning. He worked with each part, each section until the technical aspects of the singing were correct. He was aware of everything happening and he never once doubted (at least towards us) that we would pull it all together.

As a leader, your job is to enable others to get the work done. Here are three ways to do that.

First, be clear about what you want. Don’t leave people guessing about what’s expected of them. Not only the “what” of the job, but the “how” of the job as well. How do you want them to treat others, to deliver the work, what are the parameters for the assignment or task? If you don’t tell people what you expect, they are sure to disappoint you every time.

Second, trust your team to do what they do. I can’t tell you how many leaders I have known (and some I’ve worked for) who were great at telling you what they expected but terrible at letting you do it. It is a certainty, as a leader, that you will fail if you get in people’s way. Trust them to do what you have clearly communicated you expect them to do. Check in. Monitor. Verify. Offer course correction as needed. But ultimately, let them do their job.

Third, and perhaps most importantly, champion your team. Always. There is a great scene in the movie, The Blind Side where Michael Oher is playing in his first football game. He’s having a rough time figuring out what to do and the defender on the opposing team keeps blasting past him. To top it off, the referees are targeting him because of race. When his coach finally has enough and loses it on the ref, Michael realizes his coach is for him. And it makes all the difference.

On the very next play, Michael not only blocks the defender, but pushes him all the way to the opposing end zone and over the fence. People can rise to any challenge if they know you have their back. That is why championing your team is so critical.

Check out the scene here

There is a favorite quote of mine from Karen Kimsey-House that says, “Championing someone is an absolute act of belief.” When you champion your team – defend them, remove barriers to their success, and let them shine – they will amaze you with what they can do. When your team knows you believe in them and their abilities, they will kill themselves not to disappoint you.

And people will be lined up trying to grab a spot on that team.

And your reputation and influence as a leader will grow.

And you will deliver success.

After enabling others to do the work, you want them to perform at the highest levels. Next time, we discuss pulling the best work from your team.

Think about a leader you have worked with or worked for who was really good at enabling your success. What did he or she do to make that happen?